Soil, Shadow and Spirit Retreat Series
- Increasingly, humans will be in close quarters with diverse cultures as climate displacement, political instability, and other economic factors shift our locales - sometimes forcefully. As it already is for many marginalized cultures, the intentional community will become a survival imperative.
- How rigorously are we attending to the skills required to relate to ourselves and one another in this new context?
- How must Black communities (and Black women in particular) evolve in our vision of ourselves to survive and thrive in this new context, considering our roles in our families and communities - especially in times of crisis?
- How do we live during this time?
- How does healing disconnection between the bodies of women and the body of the earth increase the relational skills necessary to navigate the complexity of community building?
- What practices heal this disconnection between humans and the earth?
- What is the bi-directional flow between the bodies of women and the “body” of the earth?
- What energy do we exchange?
- What does that exchange transform in our relationship to the earth, our bodies, and the earth itself?
- How does that transformation show up?
- How does artistic expression contain the wisdom of relational practices in ways that will maintain throughout time?
The Experience
In May 2023, the facilitation team released a long-form application for the first cohort of Soil, Shadow and Spirit.
We were looking for Black mothers with experience in leadership positions who were ready to confront the shadow of power (see the "shadow work" section below), who had experience with personal development/therapeutic work (such that they could calibrate their vulnerability in a way that both honors themselves and honors the group), who had creative pursuits and a hunger to use art as transformation.
72 applications poured in for 16 available spots - an unexpected and delightful response. The facilitation team thus increased the cohort size to 20 incredible leaders:
For three days each in September 2023, January 2024 and March 2024, the cohort traveled to Paicines Ranch to explore shadow work, land ritual and creative expression.
Paicines Ranch Learning Center and the Kalliopeia Foundation generously supported all lodging, meals, facilitation and materials fees for the pilot cohort.
Community Practice: Shadow Work
This gathering investigated the relationship between radical personal responsibility, feminine power, histories of oppression, “Blackness,” and deliberate disorientation with our existing identity categories.
“In Jungian psychology, “shadow self” describes the unconscious parts of the personality that our conscious ego doesn't want to identify in itself. Individuals and systems can suppress (“not identify”) with what provokes our fear. What provokes our fear can become a prejudice and/or bias. When prejudices are accompanied by power, an exertion upon resource distribution is often found. Remaking resource distribution systems without also integrating our shadows does not work in the long term. Shadow work helps us identify blindspots and short-sightedness that may be interfering with effective relating, both internally and externally.”
The Black mama leaders in this gathering leaned into the complex shadow inquiries of power. Where in our lives have we had power and seen our shadows acting upon our behaviors in ways that impacted those we were responsible for? How has our shadow work interacted with the conundrums involved with decision-making, resource management, and people management? Where have we felt our values being impacted by the destabilizing force of holding power in a pressured environment? How does a non-duality practice support us with holding power as individuals with histories of cultural oppression?
Bayo Akomolafe’s work on Vunja also deeply inspired our orientation toward shadow work.
"'Vunja' is a Swahili word that marks the site of strange ruptures but then invites celebration and dance with/in those cracks. You can think of 'Vunja' as breakdance - the dance that breaks and the breaks that instigate dances. In a profound sense, Vunja is what Blackness seeks: breakages, openings in the coherence and purity of the master, cracks in the veneer of confidence, rifts in the vast territorial 'body' of the Man. We believe these cracks are sites of excess where things spill over, and new forms of becoming together might be cultivated. Vunja is a political and spiritual technology for gathering together, assembling things in a queer way, for performing research.
Vunja is...an attempt to go beyond modern categories and find other places of power.
With Vunja, we find a situated rhythm with no lyrics, something to move to, something to nod to and swing our hips to, something that brings down to earth (and into the cracks!) the atmospheric concepts of 'making sanctuary'."
We also had Vunja inquiries. What breakages are we seeking within ourselves? What gifts and strategies can we “materialize” together through radical disorientation of our established identities?
These and other questions informed the arc of our shadow journey together. We broke through and held each other as we met new versions of ourselves and co-created new self-conceptions that gave us deeper access to our power.
Community Practice: Land Ritual
There are more microorganisms in a teaspoon of soil than people on Earth. This inspiring abundance requires death, destruction, and countless losses to keep the life cycle flowing. Soil fertility reminds us that rapid, sometimes overwhelming, change is the essence of new life. It reminds us that creating nourishing conditions for the life cycle is how to stay grounded.
Soil teaches the joy of sitting in a field surrounded by sheep, allowing the stillness to seep into our nervous systems. It reminds us to cultivate the ability to lose ourselves in moments of peace and ecstasy, to create the circumstance for those moments to occur whenever possible.
During the retreats, “ritual” emerged from our inner wisdom about making everyday acts sacred. We sat under grandmother oak and told stories of our ancestors. We pulled elderberries from branches while we sang and wept. We watched flocking birds scream in their sunset spiral dance. We immersed ourselves in the river and let her pull our tears and fears away with the current. We prayed with the vineyard and learned its secrets. We gazed into the eyes of sheep.
We created together.
Community Practice: Creative Expression
Theater is an invitation to play. To observe the self. Both the divine and the shadow. To wonder why we are the way we are and why we do the things we do. What are our rituals? What are our habits? What do we look like when we can’t see ourselves?
These retreats invited us to stop and take a view of our inner worlds, to prioritize self-reflection. The invitation to the theater space extended that internal reflection and made it communal.
We used theater to explore our relationships with ourselves and one another. We witnessed our shadows and how we showed up as oppressed and oppressors. We brought stories, circumstances we wanted to change, questions about our roles in our victories and valleys.
We sang while we played. We moved our bodies while we played. We spent time in silence while we played. We listened to spirit while we played. We opened and closed creative space with prayer. With affirmations. We spent an entire retreat creating self-portraits and sharing our most vulnerable selves with one another. With life-giving. With visions for the renewal of ourselves and the natural world we are blessed to steward.
The Future
It's an honor to steward the experience called Soil, Shadow and Spirit. We are excited to invite another cohort to participate in 2025. We are spending the remainder of 2024 and early 2025 fundraising and activating relationships to bring it into being.
If you would like to learn more, listen to our podcast series featuring the Black mama leaders we now call sisters.
Facilitators
You can read Nikki Silvestri's formal bio here. Her bio for this gathering includes her experience raising and managing millions of dollars and hiring/firing dozens of employees. Her expertise with difficult staff encounters, from being encircled by a staff team angry about a recent employee shift to terminating most of her team after a funding loss.
She is in the era of re-wiring programming that led her to chronic dissatisfaction, intense burnout, and mental and physical fatigue. For the last two years, she has been devoted to the purification of her soul and realignment with Allah, and she feels really great about it.
Calethia has exhibited her photography and short films with galleries across the United States in group and solo exhibits. She continues to utilize her lens as a means to study and honor the natural world by photographing found objects, shapes and feminine figures that come together like a visual poem in the form of collage, cyanotype, experimental film or cinematic photograph.